With Spring Equinox approaching, I can’t help but think about balance. Balance of dark and light. The one day of the year when darkness and light share equal time. All the world shares this equality of day and night on the same day.
I wonder in my own life, what is out of balance. Then I think of how this world is so much based on duality. Dark/light. Good/bad. Yes/no. Up/down. Asleep/awake. Black/white. Above/below. Dead/ alive. Within/without, Us/them. Why do we do that so much? It is what our egos know. Ego divides all experiences into good or bad. They learn early how to survive. What is acceptable/not acceptable? Do people see me (or the image of me) in a good light or bad? Does my ego perceive the world as bad or good? Trustworthy or not? What beliefs have I formed along the way that make me perceive through certain filters?
As I let go more and more, of ego perception, I notice when it is present. I notice when I judge things as bad or good. Coal bad/solar good. Monsanto bad/7th Generation good.
On this day of equal light and dark, I want to explore balance.
As always, I go to Nature for answers.
I was hoping to see my first lizard of the season. Ah, there he is! An older one. Very cautious, but I talk him out from beneath a stone and we have a chat.
Lizard says, “Close your eyes.” I don’t. He does pushups, saying, “come on now, do you want to know what I have to say or not? Now close your eyes.”
I do, but just for a second. I open my eyes. Dang! He opens his like he knows I opened mine. Pushups again. “Slow your breathing,” says he.
Ok, my eyes are closed. My breathing is slow and deep. I feel the warmth of the sun, hear the chirping of a robin, and smell the fragrance of pine. I try to remain neutral. Suddenly, I find myself underground in a tunnel. Dark. After a while I come out at a lake. It is a lake I know from when I was a child. I loved it there. It is a place of Light. I look over and see Lizard sunning himself. He opens his eyes, and I swear he smiles and winks. We remain there for what seems like an hour, talking about balance between dreamtime and awake time, and how they can be one and the same. We go back through the underground, back to the original rock. I open my eyes. He does too. We hang out for a little bit. “You can do this anytime, you know. Switch realities. Have a little vacation”
Looking at my watch, only 7 minutes have passed on the clock!
I look up. A Red-tailed Hawk! It cries out to me, “Be in the big picture. See far.” She circles me, blessing me. She balances my energy field. I am humbled, and thank both Lizard and Hawk.
I look down. Lizard has gone. I look up, Redtail is gone.
We have horses grazing in our field over the winter. They are both strong and sensitive. I know I have a wild horse inside me. Sometimes I have to contain her wildness, collect her canter. Sometimes I let her run, experiencing thrill and joy. I’ve had to learn that balance over my lifetime. Balance work/play, power/sensitivity. Leading from the Heart, horse speaks of balancing adventure and patience.
I don’t see them but a sound reminds me of Prairie dogs, who live near here, and are out of their underground, into the light already. They balance dark and light. They tell me, “bring together what is above and what is below. Be alone and be with others. Take care of yourself and of others. Understand what is conscious and what is unconscious. Look into your own unconscious and the Collective Unconscious. Meet others there. Be one with them.”
Thank you prairie dog, you beautiful little creature.
Magpie is intelligent and wiley. They speak of using knowledge in an artful and clever way. Communication is key. Often in the summer, I enjoy meditating outside – but then, “Neeeer meep meep. Boopboopboopboop, whistle, whistle meep meep meep. Dooleeleedo.Meep!” Humorous sounds make it hard to concentrate. They say,” Balance fun and work. Don’t believe everything you think. Light and Dark. Black and White. Everything in balance – even balance itself needs to be in balance with not balance as the black in my feathers are refracted by light into green, blue and purple. Our nest have a roofs. Above/below.”
I see 32 ducks in our wet field right now. They help navigate the waters of our lives with grace and balance. They put their heads under the water to eat, showing us to ground our emotions. And they sound like they are laughing. They play, turning over and over in the water and splashing around(duck post).
Oh, there is a Morning Cloak Butterfly! They are always the first in the spring, dressed in their black wings, adorned with lacey tan edges.
She has just had her pupal experience, her dark time. Being a caterpillar, they devour everything in their path. Then they build a cocoon. Julian, in his last post said that imaginal cells, which are in the caterpillar’s DNA begin to take over. They resist it at first, as their bodies see these cells as foreign. Then they give in, and they are completely transformed into a butterfly, at which time they leave the cocoon and lightly flit and float on the air from flower to flower. I hope we as humans, so very not in balance, get over our devouring stage soon, and transform and fly as we evolve into something different. As we become more and more awake, we accept the imaginal cells and become butterfly. Maybe the whole world emerges, leaving behind mass destruction and chaos. I love that! Imaginal. That is actually the scientific name! I love to imagine. Richard Bach said, “What the caterpillar calls the end of the world the master calls a butterfly.”
I look at our wetland. It is in perfect balance. It is enjoyed by us, by deer, frogs, herons, kingfishers, raccoons, bunnies, fish, fox, elk, bear, ducks, geese, mountain lion, bobcat, porcupine and many other animals. Its balance lies with one animal – the beaver. It is the keystone species for the ponds.
Our keystone is Love.
At night, I hear Owl hooting. This one speaks of clarity of vision, and precise action. In its attunement to the harmony of life, Owl brings the two together in the dark. She is a messenger of secret wisdom.
These are the animals I saw or heard today, while thinking of balance and stepping over stones.
My Higher Self knows ego quite well. Ego only knows of Higher Self, and only as an idea. There is a balance between ego and Self. As we work effectively within the ego to fulfill our spiritual curriculum, we transcend it, and remember more and more who we really are. Ego brings up all old wounds we need to heal. Anything that disturbs our peace is an issue that needs resolving. Ego shows us our shadow. As Self grows and awakens, we no longer need ego and it will eventually disappear. It helps us with mental balance, as it shows us old beliefs and judgements, which we can let go of and open to new wisdom. It helps with emotional balance, as we let go of feelings of anger or bitterness – feelings that no longer serve us. We can balance the curious child and the wise elder within, the inner critic and the mature leader, the scared infant and the nurturing mother. This is how Authentic Self and small self can live in balance, until we transcend ego.
Living in the Now, we can use our inner compass – our Balance. Living in Balance with others – with all sentient beings, with all life, with all energy, with Gaia, and with Spirit – we can all know Unity.
In balance is the natural flow of life. Feel the flow. Be the flow. The more we are balanced, the more we find balance around us. Our Shadow is important to embrace, as is our Light. Find balance by grounding and attuning to Earth. Find equilibrium of body, mind and Spirit.
So with Equinox, may we be in balance. May we see where we are out of balance in ego, and find peace from our Authentic, or Higher Self.
Happy Equinox everyone!